IUI DAY!!!!

Ok first I have to start of by saying that the X-ray day had nothing on this one!!!

Today Jeff and I went in for our IUI and well, it was another Korean only experience. The day started out with us thinking that we would go to the doctor, early in the morning when it wouldn't be busy, Jeff would do his thing and we would both be together, holding hands, while we took the steps we would need to try to get pregnant. The only thing thing that held true was Jeff doing his thing and me doing mine.

    When we got there the place was PACKED. In fact Jeff got stuck outside in a huge line of cars waiting for a chance to even get into the parking garage. I went upstairs and filled out the paperwork and tried to find a seat among the dozens of Korean faces all looking at me. Not one chair was empty and everyone was there for the same thing. IUI. Apparently they make a day of it. So I sat down and waited a good 30 minuets for Jeff to finally park the car. As soon as he got in, they gave him his paperwork to fill out and his little cup. He went behind the big black door and I went to sit closer to him. When he came out he was laughing and trying to explain to me what the little room was like.

The lights were turned almost completely off, there was a poster of a barely naked Korean women on the wall and a leather chair that was ripped down the center. Not trying to share TMI but he chose to stand. After he was done his portion, he said he just had to turn on the TV just to see what they would be playing. He siad it was the worst Korean porn he had ever seen, and no he has never seen Korean porn. He said he only watched for a moment because he was afraid someone would hear him laughing and really start to wonder.

    While we were sitting waiting for his sperm to be "washed" I started wondering just how they keep track of who's deposit belonged to whom. I mean there were at least 45 other women there with their husbands about to have the same thing done as me. The more I wondered, the harder Jeff tried to insure me that his name and a specific number was on the container, but I am still not convinced 100% that they never make a mistake. Oh well, at least Korean babies are SO stinkin cute!!

    After about an hour and a half a nurse came over to get me and when I asked if Jeff could go too, she said no. No, really? My husband can't even be in the room when we get pregnant? Ha I guess all those times people told us we needed to sleep in the same room were wrong. Anyway the next part of this is just too absurd to even try to make up.

    While the nurse is walking me to the other side of the office she grabs another Korean women to come with us. I though nothing of it at all until we she opened the door with the IUI sign above it. Ok, still no big deal, could just be the door to another office. Boy was I wrong!! Nope, she leads us a little ways into the room and tells us to change. Yup, to change right there in front of each other with no curtain or divider. Once again I am given the tiny Korean gown to wear, but this time I am also given a tiny bathrobe to not cover up with. After we were dressed, and again this is too bazaar to make up, she brings us on the other side of this little wall to a room with a row of 10 beds. The beds are all side by side with no space at all between. The nurse then asks us to jump up on the beds next to each other. Someday I will find out why short hospital gowns equals beds that are 6 feet off the ground. 

    The two of us try our best to look the other way as we unattractively climb onto these beds. Once on, the nurse asks to lay down and covers us up. Ok so this must be some sort of waiting room, RIGHT?!?

After she gets us all covered up, she flips a switch that starts heating the bed up and then walks over to turn on a CD player before turning on a row of chandeliers. Yes you read right, in between the rows of florescent lighting is a row of gold chandeliers complete with crystals hanging down. Nice of them to set the mood.

So now I am laying on a bed that is making me feel like I peed myself, covered in a hello kitty blanket, listening to sounds of the ocean, staring at these ridicules lights with another women lying next to me who keeps making strange noise, all while being surrounded by windows on 3 sides that are covered in curtains that I am convinced are going to open any minuet for an expectant audience. The only thing I could do was turn my head and try to keep my laughter to myself.

    I mean how could this situation get more ridiculous. Oh wait, I know. The doctor could walk in, have me scoot to the end of the bed and perform my IUI while the women next to me sits up and watches. Even though the actual IUI was really uncomfortable, the only thing that I could do was put my arm over my face and laugh. I mean who ever thinks "when I get pregnant I want my husband out in another room so I can lay next to some stranger who I can't even speak to while laying under a hello kitty blanket while someone injects sperm into my uterus. Again, only in Korea."

    I have to wait 14 days before I can test and I am really, REALLY hoping this worked because I don't know if I could go though that again.    :)